Insecurity has ruined more opportunities than any sort of failure/criticism I have ever received. I've read so many blogs and listened to speakers who talked about these massive failures in their lives that they have had to overcome and almost envied them even getting to that point. To be honest, my failures haven’t been interesting stories because they happen inside my head before I can make any action! Dealing with insecurity is especially annoying when you are musician because so many activities require stepping out and performing or writing something that could end in rejection.
This year, I have come to a point where I am just tired of letting insecurity hold me back and am wanting to do more to push through my fear. Remembering I am enough, that the God of the universe made me with a purpose, and that I don't have to perform well to be loved has been the biggest part of my personal journey getting over insecurity.
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm."- Winston Churchill
Another thing I have done is try to put myself in situations where I WILL get rejected. Putting yourself in these situations will make you realize that rejection isn’t as bad as you thought, and also might teach you how many of the opportunities you thought were impossible, are in fact possible! I remember a tour opportunity to play with a well-recognized artist where they asked for a video of me singing and playing. While I do sing harmonies, I was not prepared AT ALL to give them a video of me playing and singing. I scrambled to get something together to turn in and let me tell you, it was not great (unless you consider pixelated, background noise-y, and couldn't actually hear my harmonies homemade video great...). Needless to say, I didn't get that opportunity, BUT it made me practice how to let failure roll off me. Here's an awesome TED talk too if you are into that sort of thing!
One of the things that has also helped me deal with insecurity is realizing how many amazing musicians get nervous even after performing hundreds of shows or releasing amazing albums. If Adele still gets nervous before shows, who knows if there is hope for me, but I think practicing so you can play through these times makes a huge difference. It's completely normal to feel anxious doing something that puts you even a little outside your comfort zone. I love this quote by Christy Wright that says,
"Being nervous doing something you don't have experience in doesn't mean you are doing something wrong, just that you are doing something new."
I love that! Embracing the fear means you are pushing the limits and going out of your comfort zone for something you believe in.
If there is something holding you back musically, whether that's fear of what other people think, fear of rejection, or fear of not being able to create something you love, I encourage you to go do that thing right now, remembering that you have so much to offer and that many people need the music and words you are going to give them!
